My Blog

It has been a long time I did not post blog, first of all I would like to thank all of you(Kian Han, Sue Ann, Yew Lun, Quek, Pilot), thanks for the chocolate, although it is small but to me is meaningful and I appreciate it much for another present I think more suitable for pilot, that day back ktn solve the prob between me n pilot then after sing k release all those stress, after listen ann jie advice makes me no more frustration, thx once again, especially baby puppy, hehehe…

Secondly, I’m going to thank my best friend in Kampar, Bruce, thank you for your sushi king, eventhough just both of us but really happy, I know you treat dai lou good, got heart, next time your birthday if my wallet hv enough money sure buy u Jogoya, wait for it ok.

Lastly, thanks to my groupmate (Choy Ling, Kenni, Ying Wen and Meng Wei), they bought me 2 tie and 1 set polo wallet and belt, thank you so much. Thx Keat2 and Chou2 for the tie. Then, to T9 classmate thx for the celebration, really appreciate it, so fast we know for 1 year, Thank You!

Erm, for someone that I lost contact for long time, thx for remembering my bd and I was very happy that I found u back, haha, thank you.

From today until final still have 6 weeks plus to go, this sem more harder than last sem because there are more assign need us to do plus some of the subject is tough. Next week is a tough week for me and my group member because we have 3 presentation and maybe 3 midterm test, another stress week. Today we went to Jia Hao Yue Yuen to have our dinner, eventhough just few of us go but it was a nice dinner, better than last time because no need to wear a fake mask during our meal. There are something I don’t understand, why somebody can pretend nothing when they play people feelings, like what I’ve said before, when you grow older you’ll get to know more different types of people. Actually I’m very frustrated nowadays because I don’t know who should I share my problem with, feel like there is no one can consider as true friend where I can split out all my problem and help me pass through it. Last time, I’m the one who ask people to be more optimistic and solve their problem but when I’m the one who face problem, there is a strange feeling that no one can help me, I think I have minor mental problem because I felt depress suddenly and stress for no reason nowadays, I really don’t know why, maybe I’ve face too many challenge pass 6 month, it’s been a long time I didn’t relax my mind, don’t know what should I do to overcome problems. I can’t imagine where I’ll go and achieve in the future, just like an egg shell which is empty, blank, souless, keep on wishing that there is someone can give support and care to me except my family. Looking forward for the trip where I can relax my mind. Good night…

今天我想跟大家分享我三个朋友的故事, 每一个故事都可以说是我觉得跟眼前的现实世界所面对的问题. 第一个故事, 这个是关于我所遇到的人, 希望那个人看了以后要反省一下, 这个人其实他是一个蛮好的朋友, 还记得当年我们大家有事一定会彼此鼓励对方, 最近我发觉这个人开始变了, 去年当他跟一个人吵架他一叫我与另外一个好友出来陪他, 我们毫无条件出来关心他, 让他可以过的好一点. 每次他遇到挫折, 他一定会找我与那一个好友帮他, 但是有好东西的时候总不会轮到我们, 前几天他打来跟我谈天, 他跟我说上次他去夜店是因为我的那班朋友约他, 过后他去了觉得夜店不适合他, 但是昨天他却约了一位新同事去, 本来昨晚是说要跟另一人去唱K庆祝生日, 但他却跟别的人说我的那位好友要改去夜店, 所以不要唱K, 我不明白为什么你每次都要欺骗我们, 自己要去却用人家做借口, 我希望你不要再欺骗我们感情可以吗, 我还有很多东西要骂你但是在这不便透露, 你自己反省一下.

第二个故事, 我有一位属于teenager的朋友, 他在一间咖啡厅工作, 就是在哪里被一个女服务员骗了, 那个女的弄到他无心工作还骗他的钱, 刚开始那个女的就说跟他没有可能然后就叫他死心, 过后又说给一个月试用期, 你以为现在你买机器咩, 试用, 根本就是在玩弄人家的感情, 以前那个男的工钱才RM600都没有向老板借钱, 现在有RM1500竟然不到半个月就向老板借钱, 你以为自己有几分脂色斯斯文文就可以骗人家, 真是斯文败类, 那种女子每天还说人家臭男人, 现在是很平等的, 这世界也越来越多坏女人, 当你们要说人家先看下自己.

最后一个故事, 我有一个女性朋友, 从她认识她的男人到现在, 总是对他不离不弃, 以前经营杂货每天都为他抛头露面, 去夜市摆摊, 试问现在还有哪一个女子可以这样, 但是她的男人往往就不会珍惜她, 每天对她乱发脾气还当众羞辱她, 为什么人总是那么犯贱, 对他那么好还不会珍惜, 你有今天的面子也要多得她帮你争取回来, 希望你能改下你的臭脾气对她好一点.

这个社会真的是什么人都有, 有些就被人利用, 有些就傻到明知是个深崖也要跳进去, 有些就无条件为那种冷血动物付出, 朋友的爱是这样, 情侣的爱也一样, 爱是可以让你很开心也可以要了你的命, 无论如何最重要是带眼识人, 不要随便无条件的对某些人付出, 要看那个人值不值得你这样对他, 真所谓世间险恶, 人心难测…

Yesterday, I’ve made a dinner for 2 of my best friend, the appetizer is Smoked Salmon Garden Salad with homemade vinegar sauce, the main course is Sizzling Lamb Chop, Deep Fried Pork Chop and some Braised Onion and Cauliflower, the soup is Sharkfin with Scallop and Crabmeat. The dinner started at 7pm, so far all those dish that i made still ok, just the pork chop a bit thickand made my God (Kenni) hard to cut it into small pieces to put in his mouth, the homemade sauce a bit sour than those in Chilli’s Bar, quite disappointed also, anway I’ll try harder for next time, hopefully can make it for someone special next time, below are the picture for those food and the setting before I put the food on, enjoy it.

Start from beginning of this year untill now, I have experience bad luck from relationship, friendship, and studies. Firstly, relationship, someone give me hope but grab it away when I’m finish planned a perfect date, what I get from it is few month of frustrated and thinking about the answer why? After I have know the answer, I think that I really very stupid, but I didn’t mad about her, I know maybe I can’t give her what she want, so no one has to be blamed. Friendship, sometimes is good to put a tiny gap between friends because when you don’t put some gap between that, seriously you are the one who’ll get disappointed, is good to have true friend when you think they are, but after something happen they’ll become another person which you found that like we have become stranger and cannot understand what they think, should wear a fake mask to handle it, when people become older, they’ll become faker, no more kindergarden or primary good friend, who will really treat you as best friend, well, I was wondering why all those people around us so realistic, this moment they talk bad about the person, the next moment they can pretend nothing happen, I can’t do something like that, just let me out from your game. Studies, I’ve fail one subject for this semester, which I think I can get better result for it, since lecturer ask us not to waste money to appeal for remark,  I think I should listen to him, pay rm100 jz for them to sign a stupid name but didn’t change the marks, what can I do is work more harder in this sem, what my mum said is right, sometimes we should think that obstacles can bring us precious pay also when we experience it, thanks mum. Past few weeks, my beloved dog passed away after one week my cat died also, really don’t know why God want to give so many challenge to me, what I ask is don’t give me something that I can’t deal with it, I’ll have mental problem if you give me so many difficult task, please, what I ask from you is what ordinary people experience, Thank You! Lastly, to Barcelona FC, well done, you all have done an excellent job to kick mu ass off, to let them know that they are not the only team that can be perfect, those mu supporters finally shut their mouth for praising how good their team is.

回想起这个学期的开始到今天真的是一个充满开心与伤心的学期, 我相信今天应该很多人都不会做这张考卷, 因为连我们之中最历害的人都不能找到真正的答案, 算了吧, 过去就让它过去. 刚刚从我姐姐哪儿收到我的爱犬杰杰去世的消息, 回想起当年第一眼看到它的时候, 它是多么的活泼和可爱, 每次我从学校留学回家一定会和它玩, 自从它变的有点傻的时候我就很少跟它玩了, 这些年来你是其中一位陪我渡过快乐时光的, 我有点后悔不能见你最后一面但我希望你能够投胎成人, 我会为你诵经, 希望你能走的愉快, 有缘分的话来世再见吧, 永别了杰杰…

转眼间又过了一个学期, 到目前为此跟班上的同学还是不熟, 只是见到面打下招呼吧了, 希望下个学期会改善吧, 最近看到中学那些学弟个个都长大了也觉得自己老了, 所谓时间不等人, 以前真的浪费太多无畏的时间在一些没有收获的事上, 换来的只有失落和不开心, 既然有那么多挑战, 我已经学会了要怎样在逆境中求生, 我不会这样放弃自己, 那些不懂地珍惜我的人一定会后悔, 总有一天我会证明给你们看我不是你们眼中那个傻瓜. 考试就要到了, 这次的考试应该会比上次更难, 无论如何也不能轻易的认输, 其实我发现自从大家搬到金宝每一个人都变了, 已经找不会过往那种开心的经历了, 有时很奇怪为什么某个人有了另一半就要改变, 不能在像以前一样做会自己吗, 为什么都要受那一个人应响, 算了吧, 最重要是做好自己, 没那种闲情去管人家. 祝各位考试拿满分…

今天我终于知道了真相, 为什么你不能早一点告诉我, 你知道从你不愿意见我那天, 我就一直在想我到底做错了什么或是说错什么, 这两个月以来没有一天没想你, 可能从一开始你就不相信我能带给你幸福, 就算我多么努力, 你也不会领情, 你到底知道我有多么辛苦吗, 我一直在跟另外一个我说你不是这样的人, 可能是时机未成熟, 你没有心里准备, 但是今天你跟我说你才跟他认识不久但已经在一起一个月了, 你彻底把我推进一个无限的谷底, 我到现在已经严重崩溃, nwx, 祝你好运. 我又再一次的受伤了, 最近我连驾车和上课都六神无主, 天不要再给我这样的考验, 我受够了.

还记得想当年我是多么的乐观，我可以很容易的恢复心情，但人老了，冲力少了，做什么事也开始变的婆妈了，其实可能可以用另一个角度来看，当一个人受了太多挫折和失败，无论做什么事他都会想好与坏的后果，但是前几天我终于崩溃了，当一个人给你很大的希望时，如果没有实现，那个失望也是很大的。我不懂我之前到底做错什么事，为什么每次都要另我那么难受，当你辛辛苦苦的安排好所有东西的时候，就因为一句话，你所付出的全都被收回，我想信你也一样会像我这么失落，何况那是对你那么重要的人，我自认我已经尽了我最大的能力，事情变到这样我也不想多说了，可能我就是注定要受那么多的委屈吧，我相信当一个人跌到人生最低点，他一定会反弹回去到那个最高点，就这样算了吧。

距离，我相信很多人看到这一个字都会感觉到很远，我不懂为什么老天爷每次都要给我考验，我真的就快崩溃了，为什么我不能有像一个普通的人应该有的东西，每次都要给我这样难的事情，偏偏就是要为难我，虽然彼此都对双方有意思，就是因为距离而搞的不知所措，我已经受够了，请你放过我好吗，我真的很想有一个普通人的待遇，无论发生什么我都不想这样轻易的放弃，我唯一能放松我自己只有唱歌，但是每次唱到我对你唱过的歌，我都很想哭，但哭不出来，可能是因为最伤心的哭就是连眼泪都哭不出吧，我也想对我取笑过的朋友说声对不起，为了不让你们看到我软落的一面，我选择了这样做，最后我会尽我所能，祝大家新年快乐！